I miss you more than words can express. You were my hero growing up. You’re the greatest person I have ever know. You meant the world to me.
I’m sorry I didn’t visit you on your birthday last year, I’m sorry I didn’t visit you much at all. I found your Alzheimers really hard to deal with, I hated seeing your eyes so blank when they used to have so much knowledge, humor, eccentricity, kindness, and love in them. And I hated it that you cried when I visited, when Mum would say something like ‘Hasn’t little baby Emily grown up nice?” and you would smile and nod and cry. I don’t know why, in the last few years you never recognized me, but you seemed to recognize my name. Which would then make me cry.
I can still smell your pipe tobacco, and I can still see you sat at your piano playing Dizzy Fingers, and I know that right now you’d be telling me off for crying and being so sentimental, and that I should be smiling on your birthday not crying.
I love you and I miss you.
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